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​Bringing it all back home | Janine

17/10/2016

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​Business people often complain that they bring the trials and tribulations of work home with them. During weekends and evenings, rather than fully engaging in social activities with families and friends, they find that their minds wander back to the office and the problems and challenges piled up there.  
 
Given that we care about our work, this isn’t too surprising. We take it seriously as it’s important to us. At the extreme, we let our jobs define who and what we are. Yet we also care at least as much about our families, our communities and our valuable free time.
 
Let’s re-consider this equation.
​ 
​
Suppose you find yourself talking to your partner about your difficulties at work, sharing your insecurities and angst. Or you lie awake at night worrying about your important meeting the next day. Slowly but surely, work infiltrates its way into your every waking (and sleeping) moment. Yet when you’re leading an important strategy meeting, or discussing finances with your boss, it’s unlikely that you’ll be telling your colleagues about the argument you had with your partner last night because they didn’t wash the dishes.  Nor do you let your mind wander to what you’re going to see later at the cinema.
 
Somehow, in the main, we manage to keep our home life at home. Therefore we must have all the skills needed to keep work at work. 
 
Let’s be clear, we’re not talking here about work/life balance, more about boundaries. The polarisation implied by the phrase ‘work/life balance’ is troubling, as it implies that when you are at work you’re not living, and vice versa. That would be both limiting and depressing. Perhaps it’s more useful to think about how we keep the important things in focus at their appropriate moments. 
 
How do you manage to stay focused in that strategy meeting? How do you keep the day-to-day angst of your home life at home?  Maybe you can stop allowing the troubles of your working days to seep into your family and social time. We know how to be present and how to keep things in perspective when we have to.  We do it all day, so let’s take that into the evenings and weekends as well.
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