The new Face-to-Face

Everybody’s saying it’s time to go on-line, to keep in touch by WhatsApp and text. Which is great for those who are comfortable on-line, like to write and have the tech knowledge and bandwidth. 
 
Here’s another option : How about using our mobiles for their initial design ….talking to each other?
 
When I started my coaching career,  based in London, before Skype and Zoom became the norm, one of my first big contracts was with Lancaster Business School. I was working with entrepreneurs who were based in the  North of England. 
 

Even though I’d spent much of my youth chatting to friends for hours on end about the important things in life such as who was dating whom and what to wear for the next party, I was slightly daunted by the prospect of having structured, in-depth and support-based conversations with people on the phone. Although much of my coach training in the 90’s was via teleconference, I wondered how I would cope if I couldn’t see them. Surely I’d miss something vital to the client's progress - a twitch, a smile or raised eyebrow.

Tackling this head on, in addition to starting work as a ’tele-coach’, I volunteered for The Samaritans, conducting phone conversations on the suicide helpline. 
 
I love meeting people, going out and socialising. What I wasn’t prepared for was the intimacy that a telephone conversation brings. And along with the intimacy, an enhanced possibility of change.
 
Think about it: you are placing your ear next to the other person's face. There’s less interference, as the client isn’t distracted by the coach's facial movements, perhaps unhelpfully misinterpreting a  twitch as judgement or boredom. Likewise, the coach is focusing purely on what is being said, with all other distractions filtered out. 
 
I was reminded of this last week as a client who’d been talking about personal issues at work, declared at the end of the conversation, ‘That was incredibly useful, and I’m so glad we’re on the phone, as I’d never have been able to talk about all of that stuff if you’d been able to see me!’
 
When people are perhaps feeling lonely and isolated, missing the warmth of the ‘hello hug' and the kindness of a ‘nice-to-meet-you’ handshake, we can still experience a certain type of intimacy. Go on, pick up the phone, have a chat. Ear-to-Ear could be the new Face-to-Face .